- I now realize what I was really eking towards with my anti-kindle and e-books phase yesterday. The world is becoming less authentic and less lovable. Everything is being stripped down to its bare, essential state. There is nothing to be fascinated by. Why have a book when you can just download all the words and probably an image of the cover? This is a world of images and projections. How long before our own very bodies are reduced in the same way? As Pessoa remarked, the sanctity of the human body from an aesthetic perspective only exists in cultures where clothing is more than arbitrary and optional. As I see television shows and adverts getting racier and the bodies of men and women being scandalized further, I think the future is both bleak and far from perplexing; its quite clear where we're headed. Perversion is being standardized. THe other day some kid in my public speaking class gave a speech and asked, with heavy implication on the affirmative, if the men in the class would like to see a naked woman in an advert. The casualty of such a question, to pose it to a class not only filled with men. That isn't the product of anyone that heralds intimacy as one of life's finest attributes. I've digressed largely, but I feel this is one example of how much future generations are likely to not even believe in beauty so much as they believe in expressed or replicated beauty. And I believe this is a direction we should avoid at all cost. Someone told me I fetishized books by preferring them over their electronic competitors. Tonight I came to understand thats because I don't mind fetishizing life. I think the will to live only exists with a love for aesthetic idiosyncrasies as well as banalities (sometimes - rarely, rather). Gah. I think we're moving more in the direction of impatience than we need to be. Thats what I've been trying to prove/say. I've been addressing everything with what David Foster Wallace said about how profusely americans acknowledge their own impulses; we do so without regard or prudence, without contemplation about consequences or necessity. And I would say that being able to download everything takes some of the pleasure there is in living at a brisk pace, or as Bukowski put it, "aging gently". Listening to vinyl is a much more involved process than simply playing a cd that you can skip around on.


- I feel such an urge to disconnect from humanity that I will not suffer fools gladly in the time I spend not ruminating heavily upon burdensome topics like death, the fragility of the earth, my own absurd existence, and so on. I don't know how people claim to dislike humans and their stupidity yet they're entertained by fucking idiots. I just don't see the extrapolation there. Is that response to exploitation any different from the ones that idolize fools and want to be some bitchass loser on the real world? Christ. I think this is what has always ate away at me when I find out someone listens to, for instance, Joy Division and the fucking Yin Yang Twins or some other group of dumbasses. How can true affection as a fan of music exist for both those acts within the same person? Just doesn't make sense to me. Essentially, what is being said is one enjoys the world and loathes it but doesn't loathe the people that make life loathsome, we instead enjoy their stupidity and impetuousness. Their buoyant, artificially sly remarks about sex and casual romance made in passing as if the subjects were equally worthless yet attainable.


that all nowhere.